MY MIND IS YET ELSEWHERE AGAIN
My mind was in so many places last night...just a 'capper' to a very bluesy day. I guess the reality of having to return home to 4 days of cramming set root - all to complete a preliminary school project prior to the first day of my Senior Project Class II after two plus weeks of total vacation bliss. But other issues were stirring around in my head. Worries about picking up an internship with a good company, worries about a real paying job in another 4 months, worries about what direction my personal life will take after school, frustrations over the fact that students (me included) were given an amount of work over our break that was much larger than it should have been. I think you probably have a picture of why I was restless.I simply want the ride to be over with and I think many of you know what I am referring to in my life...SCHOOL AND THE UNCERTAINTY OF FUTURE WORK. I know...you have heard this before but bare with me. This is one of the few times that I do DO it...worry, stress, bitch...whatever you chose to call it.
Hell, humor me here...you all must have something to bitch about, something that has been gnawing at you. Well fess up! Maybe by me reading your issues, mine won't feel so disproportionately HUGE. An if they aren't on par with mine at least you will have had the opportunity to get it out of your system.
So....
posted by Tony @ 9/08/2006 12:01:00 AM
12 comments
12 Comments:
Tomorrow is another day:)
LOL on Sorted...I am pissed and clueless on the problems you are having viewing my site. You are the only person who has mentioned it. Try refreshing the page once it loads....otherwise I am stumped. Have a great weekend studly...everything will work itslef out I am sure.
I just want to win the Powerball or a dashing wealthy man to sweep me off my feet so i never have to work again. That is what I want. Chances of that happening? NIL. :( Shit... now I will have to work on those "goals".
God, I have so many issues I should sell subscriptions. But you know me, I never complain.
I'm not in love with my boyfriend. I don't want to hurt him, but I don't want to pretend like our relationship is going to ever be anything deeper than a friendship. He's more into porn than me sexually and more concerned about his mother than me emotionally.
I'm on medication and tired of it, it's caused my sex drive to be almost nothing, I really want to stop taking it. I’m starting to realize I deserve more and should be willing to demand it, from myself and others. I’ve zero motivation to do what I want with my life and can’t seem to go forward… how’s that for bitching?
I am tired of being single, I am tired of doing for others and not getting done for in return, I am tired of putting others and their feelings first, I am tired of being overworked and underpaid, I am tired of the heat of Florida, I am tired of being tired and I just want someone to hold me and cuddle me on a permenant basis - just to hear someone say that they loved me, and they really ment it, I think would take away the weight of the world... at least in my book right now it would... how is THAT for a bitch!
For the first time in my life, I feel trapped. I won't hijack your comments with a long explanation. But you have sparked a post for me.
OH bud, I hear your pain, I found yesterday morning I have a new boss and my current boss took a demotion. I don't like this new guy is some big wig in the military and when he tells you to do something he expects it to be done perfectly. He doesn't care how, don't ask him any questions just give him results.
ARUGH!!!!!!
Tony, please forgive me for being a bit preachy--- this is NOT what you asked for--- but just a bit of advice: Get out of your own way.
As I understand it, you have an important project to prepare for in the next four days; so do it, man, and forget about everything else until that's taken care of! This is not the time to worry about job prospects or internships; push all that aside until the project is ready. You don't have time to do anything about the inernship or the job now, anyway. The only thing that focusing on those things now will do is get in your way and foul up being able to do your school work.
Once the school work is finished, you'll be able to focus on the other issues more effectively and and actually start taking action to treat those problems. And doing something to tackle those problems will, of course, make you feel better. But for now, push them aside.
Again, Tony, please forgive the sermon, but it really does look like you're putting stones in your own path.
(Feel free to tell me to but out and mind my own business.)
A few months ago my doctor introduced me to Ativan, and boy have the blues rolled off of me. Now, I just need Kelly to fix me a drink...
Tony, going back to school as part of a career change after having been out in the "real world," is frequently more difficult than we anticipate. I, at least, found it so (I tried in my 30s, after having earned a PhD in another field. I gave it up and managed the career change without the second degree.)
Especially if you have been in a position of authority, as you seem to have been, the esentially passive role of a student is very diffficult to accept at times. Students may be encouraged to question, even to challenge their professors (I encourage mine to do so), but the whole structure of the educational system assumes a passive role for the student in terms of the curriculum or general structure of the program. This is frequently understandibly rough for ex managers to swallow.
But it seems that a second degree is really necessary for your career change and you are almost finished. So, tough it out, man.
(As for religion, accepted. We'll agree to disagree.)
It's hard adjusting after a wonderful trip like that. I can't quit thinking about all you guys! The camradirie was awesome. I loved squeezing you!
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