A SPECIAL DAY FOR A SPECIAL SOMEONE / "WHAT WOULD YOU DO?" MONDAY (#13)
"Afterall, how could I ignore someone that could lay such a flattering comment on me. ... If I could digress briefly, I have to share with you the first thought that popped into my head when I saw D****'s picture: 'What a big giant warm, fuzzy teddy-bear.' ... D**** is very much the sensitive, open-and kind-hearted, introspective, genuine person that so much of his writing portrays. These are just a few of the traits that I love about him. The other thing that always draws a warm smile from me is D****'s ability to be so openly blunt and real in such a southern innocent way. I love it!
We have often exchanged stories over the phone about family. He always speaks fondly of his immediate, as well as extended family. I am no different. I think some of that comes from his upbringing - family values, morals, faith...."
This was an excerpt from my November 2, 2006 post entitled A Southern Boy Friendship. It pertained to my blogger bud and someone I am proud to call a close friend. And that incredible friend is Derek, over at Past, Present, and Future. What more can I say about a man that carries a huge 'plus' mark in my Book of Life! If only we had a few more of him cloned, the world might be a much brighter place. Not to mention that I will have died and gone to heaven that many more times because the world is populated by yet another bearish southern-accented man! Heart be still. LMAO.
So what's my point for all this hype over Derek. I have an important message for him......
So what's my point for all this hype over Derek. I have an important message for him......
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
YOU BIG 'TEDDY-BEAR!!!'
YOU BIG 'TEDDY-BEAR!!!'
As I have said in the past big fella', I am so lucky to be able to call you a 'dear friend.' Huggerz!!!
So with the hoopla all spelled out, let's get on to today's post. It's What Would You Do? Monday. I'd like to play off the above post and ask you the following question: If you had a dear friend who was turning FORTY years old and knew he/she was a little sensitive about this seemingly threshold age, what would you do - throw a surprise party, keep the celebration low key and private, or ignore any celebration of sorts? Elaborate please.
A 'toughie' for me. I so love to encourage people to enjoy the person they are and that includes their age. Part of me would want to through a big party, assuming I could handle it financially. But I do understand that some people are overly-conscious of their age. I think that I would likely probe my friend indirectly to determine if he/she would really have a meltdown if I made the bold move to throw a party. If I senses some positive feedback, I probably would make the lunge and go forth with the party. Otherwise I'd honor my friend's desires to utter privacy.
Well?.....
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So with the hoopla all spelled out, let's get on to today's post. It's What Would You Do? Monday. I'd like to play off the above post and ask you the following question: If you had a dear friend who was turning FORTY years old and knew he/she was a little sensitive about this seemingly threshold age, what would you do - throw a surprise party, keep the celebration low key and private, or ignore any celebration of sorts? Elaborate please.
A 'toughie' for me. I so love to encourage people to enjoy the person they are and that includes their age. Part of me would want to through a big party, assuming I could handle it financially. But I do understand that some people are overly-conscious of their age. I think that I would likely probe my friend indirectly to determine if he/she would really have a meltdown if I made the bold move to throw a party. If I senses some positive feedback, I probably would make the lunge and go forth with the party. Otherwise I'd honor my friend's desires to utter privacy.
Well?.....
posted by Tony @ 12/11/2006 12:00:00 AM
11 comments
11 Comments:
As hard as it might be, I'd try to honor my friend and his wishes.
Now, excuse me while I go wish Derek a happy birthday!
I would keep the celebration low-key and private, in essence trying to acknowledge the event but also honoring the wishes of the person honored. That's how I would want it. (Unfortunately, its not how it was for my 40th.) I tend to think that birthdays are for the honored. To often I sense that some birthday parties are more about the partiers.
I am not usually up for a big party. But I do like to celebrate. When I turned 40 (last year) I did it with Chris on a cruise ship. They provided the cake! Awesome. Chris wants to go to Ireland for his 40th... So I say, get out of town, go somewhere special, celebrate in style with the one you love.(congrats on your course!)
You honor the friends wishes - whatever they may be... and you know my feelings on birthday - the less discussion the better... there comes a time when you stop expecting others to celebrate your birthday - and that time is about when you turn 13.
There is NOTHING worse than saying you don't want a party or a fuss and then someone who knew your wishes does it anyway - it totally negates your feelings and drives home the fact that as Lemuel said, 90% of the time the party is for the GIVER not the birthday person...
I think I would do the same and honor their wishes. It would be tempting though to throw a party with black balloons and all, but I am sensitive to peoples feelings, usually. Heck 40 is the new 30, isn't it??
What a nice little story of yours and Dereks friendship. He does seem like a Southern Gentleman, and if we're going to start cloning people that's a good place to begin.
a fair question.
I am torn between the usual custom of trying to honor what a person wants and not letting be a putz.
In the end I guess 'party'. You know what does it? I've had too many friends and patient NOT live to see 40. So to reach such should be a celebration not only for that but moving into a new era.
Jokes aside 40 is not a bad decade to be thank you!
PS - Derek is a dear, don't ya just want to sqeeze him all over??
Funny you should ask...my partner just turned 40 in October...and we threw him a surprise party. :-)
Well if it were me, you can go ahead and throw me that big surprise birthday party! But better make sure you go through my address book secretly, cause I don't want be asked who to invite.. LOL
I once gave a party for a 40 year old person, and one of the invited guests look wistfully and said that they remembered their 40th.. and that it was 30 years ago
Milestone birthdays should be memorable in someway.. I had a big party for my 40th and a hobbit party for my 50th, so make it memorable wheter it is big or small
I say throw the party. It'll be a blast and you'll all be glad you did in the end.
I'm along the lines of UrSpo in that I think that 40 needs to be celebrated; even if the person doesn't feel like celebrating. Looking back on it, they'll realize 40 ain't so bad, and they'll remember the sweet thing you did. But it really depends on how close of a friend it is. Like I threw a surprise party for a very good friend on his 40th; even though he was in the doldrums. He greatly appreciated it. But I think that's something only a really good friend or spouse/partner could pull off without resentment - as they would know the person better than anyone else. Because some people really MEAN it when they say low-key. The trick is reading through the innuendos - which can only be done if you really know someone. At any rate - it's always most important to respect someone's wishes :) How contradictory was that? LOL By the way, Tony - I got an email from you, but there was nothing in it LOL
damn you and Spider got me all choked up tonight. I was just writing in Spider's blog how I almost felt like it wasn't even my birthday today. I've had the blah's and had been writing some deep stuff I hadn't even put on my blog yet, I may not now. Thanks from the bottom of my heart bubbas. You are a good friend. I'm all tingly like I'm supposed to be on my birthday now.
Well for my 40th next year, I think I want to celebrate like Danation, I may even change my blog to Turning 40 since this will be my last year of my 30's. But as all said I would honor what my friend wants.
Hug! Hugs! Hugs! From me and all my clones out there, you know I was abducted by aliens and there really are a lot of me's out there, just be careful, some of them are a little scary.
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